What Should I Say at a Networking Event? 10 Conversation Starters That Work
I still remember standing outside my first networking event in Richmond, Virginia. I was an economics student, and through the open doors I could see a few hundred professionals in sharp suits, laughing like they'd known each other for years. I didn't know anyone. My heart was pounding.
I walked up to a man standing alone by the coffee station and said, "Hi, I'm a student studying economics. I'm hoping to work in banking doing monetary research." My voice cracked. He smiled and asked, "First event?" Then he introduced me to a few people.
That's when I learned something I still teach today: you don't need to be fearless. You need to be prepared. Here's what to prepare.
1. Have your story ready
Before the event, write one or two sentences that say:
Who you are (your field of study or work)
What you're aiming for (your next step or goal)
Why it matters to you
For example: "Hi, I'm Maria. I'm studying computer science, and I'm especially interested in cybersecurity because I want to help protect people's data." Practice it out loud until it feels natural.
2. Open with a question: 10 conversation starters that work
Questions show interest, reduce awkwardness and make people feel seen.
"What brought you to this event today?"
"Is this your first time attending an event like this?"
"How did you hear about this event?"
If they share what field they're in, ask:
"How did you get started in your field?"
"What do you enjoy most about your work?"
"What's one thing you're currently working on that you're excited about?"
"What's one piece of advice you wish someone gave you earlier in your career?"
"What trends are you noticing in your industry lately?"
"Are there any people or companies here you're hoping to connect with?"
"What was the highlight of your week so far?"
3. Keep the conversation going
Once it starts, focus on listening. These follow-ups keep it moving:
"That's really interesting. What made you choose that path?"
"What's been the most surprising part of your work so far?"
"Thanks for sharing that. Can you tell me more about it?"
4. Exit gracefully
Every conversation has a natural ending. Try:
"It was really great talking to you. I want to be mindful of your time. Would it be okay if we connected on LinkedIn?"
If they say yes, add: "Would it also be alright if I occasionally update you on my progress?"
If you freeze
It happens to everyone. Take a breath, smile, and be honest: "Sorry, I'm a little nervous. This is new for me." Most people will appreciate it. Then pivot: "Can I ask what brought you to this event?"
Quick mindset tips
Start with someone standing alone. They're probably just as unsure as you are.
Focus on the other person, not yourself. Curiosity cures self-consciousness.
You're not trying to impress. You're trying to connect.
These steps come from my book How to Network Without Anxiety, which walks you through five steps to open doors and boost your career, with worksheets for your story, your goals and your follow-up.
You might also like: How to Network Without Anxiety: 5 Simple Tips for Students
Quick answers
What is a good icebreaker at a networking event?
"What brought you to this event today?" It's easy to answer and leads naturally into work and interests.
How do I start a conversation if I'm shy?
Look for someone standing alone, smile, and ask, "Is this your first time attending an event like this?"
How do I leave a conversation politely?
Thank them, say you want to be mindful of their time, and ask if you can connect on LinkedIn.
